Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Viva le differance
When the salesman at Atkins and Grainger was surprised that I had never heard the nickname, Wack Bennett, my feelings were not hurt, but they could have been had that happened ten years ago.
I have never figured out why people have a need to act so superior because someone else doesn't know what they know. Not true. I do know why they do it - they do it because they have a need to be right and they get a boost to their ego if they know something that someone else doesn't - how bazaar is that?
In Ontario it is no different - actually I often felt somewhat bruised by others' reactions when I honestly declared that I didn't know something or someone. On first impulse, without thinking, I admit my ignorance. I notice that I put myself down quite often with "oh how clever you are...I'm not that smart or quick thinking." And guess what, when I do that my friends usually feel quite comfortable pointing out my shortcomings.
A frequent one here in Vancouver is, "you don't have a very good sense of direction do you." Now that one really gets me. No kidding, in Toronto, the city of my birth, as a real estate agent I had a gift for finding my way - it was easy because I automatically used the Lake as my point of reference, but even without even knowing which direction the Lake was - I seemed to know instinctively. Admittedly, when I travelled west to locations around the Lake, the directions became more difficult - because the Lake was now East or even North as I drove around it to Niagara Falls.
In Vancouver, the mountains are to the north - easy - as long as I know where they are:)
Anyway, another difference between the BCers the Ontarians - is their attitudes. In Ontario a person with a need to know seems more aggressive than the BCers.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Evolution of Bonobos to Human Beings
Bonobos are apes - the bonobo shares more than 98 percent of our genetic profile, making it as close to a human as, say, a fox is to a dog - says scientist, Frans B. M. de Waal, http://songweaver.com/info/bonobos.html.
My interest in Bonobos arises from my curiosity about sexuality in men and women - particularly men.
I learned about sexual tension early in my life. In the bedroom next to mine, I frequently overheard my mother crying over her suspicions and chastising my father for being with other women. Without understanding the sexual intimacy between my parents, I was aware that my mother was blocking affection from my father.
The topic of sex was taboo in our Canadian household as I suspect that it was in most families in the 40s and continues to be so even now in 2010. My mother and father never even used the word "sex" in front of my sister and me. Nor did they use proper language to describe body parts. In fact my mother covered herself up if I, her eldest daughter, suddenly surprised her in her bedroom while she was dressing.
Perhaps my mother is laughing now at how ridiculous we all are in this human form on this planet earth. And maybe she is applauding me for finally going out on a limb - another limb - to delve into "taboos".
My natural curiosity drives me and questions even the idea of taboos. How can anything be wrong and forbidden?
I love Rumi, "Out there beyond the ideas of wrong doings and right doings is a field, I'll meet you there." How can anything be wrong or right - everything just is.
To say that my entire life was destroyed because of society's bazaar attitude toward sexuality is a huge understatement.
In fact, how strange is it that I am only now in my sunset years exploring sexuality and coming to the realization that humanity in general has been deceived by "religious zealots", and philosophers, and royalty whose very devious intentions to control mankind by oppressing sexuality wreaked havoc on the entire planet.
Of course I could be dead wrong about that, but this is the beginning of my research to uncover what the hell went wrong with human beings that caused me to miss out on the magnificent experience of sexual freedom.
Why is sex still taboo? You might say well, it isn't any more. You can find all the sex you want on the internet.
If sex has risen to a new level of acceptance why are there still advocates for monogamy.
Examine the sexual patterns of Bonobos:
First, anything, not just food, that arouses the interest of more than one bonobo at a time tends to result in sexual contact. If two bonobos approach a cardboard box thrown into their enclosure, they will briefly mount each other before playing with the box. Such situations lead to squabbles in most other species. But bonobos are quite tolerant, perhaps because they use sex to divert attention and to diffuse tension.
Second, bonobo sex often occurs in aggressive contexts totally unrelated to food. A jealous male might chase another away from a female, after which the two males reunite and engage in scrotal rubbing. Or after a female hits a juvenile, the latter's mother may lunge at the aggressor, an action that is immediately followed by genital rubbing between the two adults.
What happened way back in time to crush our natural sexual expression? The result of trying to crush mother nature is that she always manages to escape from the bondage imposed on her. Man simply cannot keep what is natural from having its way and what has been oppressed escapes in unpleasant ways.
I suggest that aggression is the result of sexual oppression - war is the result of sexually frustrated human beings - mostly males.
See how Bonobos deal with aggression and conflict...
During reconciliations, bonobos use the same sexual repertoire as they do during feeding time. Based on an analysis of many such incidents, my study yielded the first solid evidence for sexual behavior as a mechanism to overcome aggression. Not that this function is absent in other animals--or in humans, for that matter--but the art of sexual reconciliation may well have reached its evolutionary peak in the bonobo. For these animals, sexual behavior is indistinguishable from social behavior. Given its peacemaking and appeasement functions, it is not surprising that sex among bonobos occurs in so many different partner combinations, including between juveniles and adults. The need for peaceful coexistence is obviously not restricted to adult heterosexual pairs.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Thoughts about the silence of sex taboos
It knows all there is to know that is important for spiritual growth - and there is nothing more important than spiritual growth for we are nothing but spirit with a physical body for the convenience of playing out our drama on this planet in this lifetime.
Q. For most of my adult life (I am repeating myself) I have wondered why sex is such a taboo activity and therefore topic of discussion.
Q. Why is incest so rampant?
Q. Why do fathers and mothers molest young children?
While I am asking these questions, I am doing my best to remain consciously alert and aware of how my body is feeling and what thoughts are trying to surface but somehow seem to be thwarted as they begin to bubble up in my mind.
Fascinating. My mind has an automatic censor trigger - no kidding - taboo thoughts are blocked as they try to manifest in my mind. But I know that I have control over my mind so I will do my best to allow all thoughts to manifest. It is important for my research.
My research is about sexuality and why human beings everywhere have been mislead and by allowing our natural urges to be denied we have disabled a major aspect of our physical and spiritual being.
How could something so major to our human evolution have been allowed to destroyed the very essence of who and what we are.
I feel incensed and am determined to do everything I can to help humanity to overcome that destructive force.
We are so brainwashed as to be unconscious about our imprisonment. For years I was aware of feeling that I was being held captive behind prison bars.
I thought that psychotherapy and my latest experiences with meditation had opened the door and that I had walked out to freedom.
Fooled again.
But not for long. Even with the benefits of meditation and my understanding and awareness of EGO holding me unconscious - when it comes to sexuality, I am still a prisoner.
The other day when my friend Mataji Eleanor stayed over with me on her way to a spiritual retreat in Portland, Oregon, she invited me to choose one card from a deck of them with a question to the Universe. My question as it always is - actually it is more of a request - was to show me what is the next step on my quest for enlightenment. What do I need to know to move forward and upward?
Well as usual, the Universe guided me to a new book that has been released called Sex at Dawn. I wrote about it yesterday and did not finish the post.
The website that I found in my Google search for the meaning of love, that became statement, "prehistoric peace without war", was Dr. Susan Block.
She was promoting Christopher Ryan's new book and includes a long audio interview with him that aroused my excited curiosity as well as my sexual urges.
I quickly emailed the url to Tommy - who must have been very surprised to have me recommending such a website that he had not even seen yet. I was not aware at the time that Dr. Block's site is a porn site ( a so-called porn site) but when I returned to the site sure enough I had missed the very obvious explicit sex photographs in the left margin ???????
Anyway next came new information about Bonobos - apes that have existed for millions of years - that live in communities of no more than 150 members (Tipping Point recommends that size of community as being completely harmonious). These apes are remarkably close to human beings in many ways. Christopher was particularly interested and writes about their sexuality. These marvelous creatures thrive on open sexual relationships. They live harmoniously together and act out their sexual urges whenever and wherever they choose. No sexual taboos exist within this species.
I will read this book and even buy it because I do believe this is my next step toward freedom.
So many questions...
Q. When did the evolution from apes to homo sapiens change sexual freedom?
Before I go on with the questions - last night Trevor took his mom, Bernice and I to the Giggle Dam Club in Port Coquitlam to celebrate Bernice's 70th birthday. What a blast that was - very worth the $50 I was going to pay to join them - "was going to pay" because it turned out to be a free evening including dinner and drinks. The owners are friends of Trevor.
After the show while parked outside Bernice's apt. Trevor shared about he and Monika's decision to split up - to end their marriage, or to change it - still not carved in stone. The reason they are breaking up is that Trevor wants to move out of their monogamous relationship - and Monika can't agree to follow suit.
Co-incidentally I am evolving with regard to my ideas about open relationship and sexuality and I shared this with Trevor - naming Tommy as my current beau and teacher on my new adventure. Bernice and Trevor know Tommy.
As we were talking, I had a very funny visual of me showing up at the Tantric event that is happening on Oct 29th in North Van. I shared it with them - that Tommy has invited me to attend a Tantric event and it would be a riot if Trevor showed up at the same event - Trevor's grin stretched across his face and his face may have even turned red (it was too dark to see) but he laughed and said he was registered to attend the even and we talked about that for a while. In the end Trev said that he would be OK if I showed up but he would not be practicing the tantric touching exercises with me. How bazaar is that - a step son and his step mom attending the same sexually free event - sounds like a Greek mythology - or a scene from a historical novel.
It is definitely shaking my foundations.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Exercise energizes
I haven't danced Tango since New Years Eve because I was in so much pain for most of that evening that I haven't had the desire to do that to myself again.
But I did dance ballroom with Tony in Toronto at the 30-Up club completely without pain. I was just so out of shape that I could hardly breath after one dance. The miracle was that my feet did not hurt so I am so looking forward to returning to TO just to dance again.
So, my plan is to exercise seriously and get fit so that I can dance for the whole evening, or at least as long as my feet don't hurt.
I joined the Riley Park Community Centre with a three month leisure pass that will expire in December. I have attended two classes of exercise, both of which are just what I need - one was a mild boot camp - briskly walking around the gym getting up my heart beat, stopping and starting, stepping over apparatus placed stragically so that we walk two steps and step up for one and walk for two, etc. Then we walked around them, we walked backwards, we used balls to exercise our legs - we used light weights while walking and while exercising against the wall - then we ended with mat work.
The next class was at 7:00 am, this morning. It was core work - very gentle balancing on balls, then holding the balls while balancing on one leg, - we walked outside around the block twice - exactly what I need.
I plan to do some aqua fit classes - they have them at the new fitness centre just across the street from the old Riley Park Centre. Aqua fit is available every day for an hour at 9:30 am. I will try to fit in at least one or two per week.
Am I overdoing the fitness thing? I don't think so - after all I have nothing else to do and I certainly need to get fit.
Went to Deep Cove with Bernice this afternoon and I had so much energy I couldn't sit still - I felt light and energetic - it was wonderful.
I am also planning to go Salsa dancing - which means I will attract a friend to go with me since I would rather go with someone than go alone.
I would also like to find a friend to go ballroom dancing with. Let's see if the Universe provides me with that too - it could be male or female. It could be just one person who loves to dance and is game to try out all kinds of dancing.
Deep Cove is so beautiful - it is one of my favourite places to go and we usually have an early dinner -we split a BLT with avocado and lettuce sandwich and french fries at the Bistro at the corner of the main street - we always sit outside and to day was warm and sunny.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Premier Gordon Campbell at Bilderberg meeting
Re: Global & Mail, Aug 8, 2010. Gordon Campbell’s trip to elite Bilderberger conference cost B.C. thousands. Author, Ian Bailey
Dear Mr. Campbell
Oh my oh my! Aren't you quite a success! Yo Mama will be proud.
Being invited to a prestigious Bilderberg meeting with the most elite leaders in the world - WOW! You must feel like you have been invited to the KING's court.
But BEWARE, MR. CAMPBELL! Heads roll in places like that! And yours is about to roll in your little Kingdom of BC.
And hopefully it will happen before you can do much more damage to your citizens.
Mr. Campbell, please explain the benefits to BC citizens of your attendance at the Bilderberg Meeting in Spain in June, 2010.
My concerns about your attendance there are multi-fold.
1. Why would a meeting about global matters have to be ultra secret? "Ultra-secret" anything sounds the alarms and feeds conspiracy-minded folks ammunition to delve deeply behind the scenes and to allow their imaginations to run wild and dangerously.
2. Would the presence of Larry Summers be the reason for secrecy? His reputation reeks of slimy association with Milton Friedman Chicago Boys.
3. Twenty eight countries represented? What happened to all the rest of the countries on this planet?
Discussions of great global importance should not be limited to just a few select countries. Or perhaps those countries not in attendance are demonstrating high moral standards and ethics and would not be caught dead with the likes of Kissinger and Summers.
Mr Campbell, your record to date is very tarnished. Lying and secrecy just add a few more nails in your coffin. I shudder to think of what destruction you can wreak on BC citizens until your term is up.
Although the thought of spending tax payers dollars for unnecessary, useless and wasteful purposes like Recalls sickens me. If you would just do the right thing with the HST - for example - and just stop it - whether or not you think it will be good for BC economy - 700,000 people of BC obviously don't give a damn about that - they see it as helping big business and big pharma - HELLO!
Canada has no respect and offers no place in the government for leaders who are more interested in "for profit" "free trade" kinds of economics. While they sound practical and logical, somewhere along the line they go awry - they eliminate the middle class - those on who our economy depends. Why would you threaten that group of people? Oh ya! Big Business and Big Pharma!!!!!!
How dare you ignore the plight of so many citizens whose tax dollars are allowing you to indulge your pleasures and addictions.
In your own backyard, on the streets of Vancouver, people suffering from mental illness are dying from drug related disease.
Homeless people are not all alike - yes there are some who choose to remain victims of society - but wake up Mr. Campbell. There are those who have made mistakes in their lives and just need a supporting hand to assist them out of their self-imposed gutter.
And yet you ignore them. Your priorities are warped.
Of course the economy is important - an economy that supports the rich on the backs of the poor is a disgrace.
A gambling casino in downtown Vancouver can hardly be called a priority. Oh Ya! It would bring in a ton of money and then you could put in the much needed mental health facility - but it would have to be very large for those addicted gamblers who will soon require medical mental health attention to overcome their addictions.
Education can not be considered a secondary priority - to downgrade our education system is to spit in the face of BC citizens. It is to admit that you are mentally challenged yourself.
Mr. Campbell what could you possibly gain by dumbing BC citizens?
More money in your pocket perhaps?
Frankly I find it shocking and disappointing that big pharma and big business cannot see their way clear to re-distribute their wealth to support the citizens of Canada and BC.
How ridiculous is that? Yes, naive it is. Greed is an adiction - the more money one has, the more money one wants. The more alcohol one consumes the more one craves.
Addictions abound in human beings. But hopefully our leaders' addictions do not impair their minds.
Ooops! Forgot about Gordon Campbell's "drunk driving" charges.
A Premier of a province in Canada who gets charged with drunk driving demonstrates a fucked up mind.
Should he remain our leader?
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Thoughts about todays news
Writing my thoughts helps me to understand what is going on. Naomi Klein's book, Shock Doctrine: The Rise of Disaster Capitalism is my most recent source of information. Other sources of information are conspiracy theory types of videos I have watched over the past ten years or so. Linda McQuaig's book, Holding the Bully's Coat, is another source of my education.
What does it matter how a "bloody" war is funded? Except perhaps to catch the criminals who create it and benefit from it.
Currency of all kinds has been used to fund wars which are always "bloody" for many thousands of years. Blackmail and scare tactics are used to start wars too!
What is important is the "creators" and the "planners" of war should be punished for their "war crimes". Wars are also funded by taxpayers, either directly or indirectly in the guise of taxes to improve and enhance citizens lifestyles.
Canadian taxpayers are paying for the Canadian armed forces to support the war in Afghanistan today - or am I not seeing things clearly here. Call it what you like - if soldiers are involved, the citizens of country they defend are paying for their weapons with their hard earned money and their lives.
Was Charles Taylor acting on the advice of Milton Friedman's Chicago Boys privatize public utilities using the "shock doctrine?"
If Naomi Klein investigated these so called war crimes in Liberia, is it possible that she would reveal that the same instigators that deceived and devastated the governments of Chile, Argentina, Russia, and other countries were none other than Friedman's favoured economic students who were nothing better than criminals?
Does this gang of Friedmanians go unpunished for the millions of human beings who were killed, tortured, forced into abject poverty while they opened trade markets to the rest of the world so a few elite individuals got richer and richer?
And what of the creators of wars that distract citizens while implementing policies and procedures designed to introduce free trade and privatize public utilities and institutions all for the purpose of profit? The procedures used were, and maybe even are even today, equal to the so called war crimes described at the trial of Charles Taylor.
What is preventing the law enforcers from punishing the Chicago Boys? They are not hard to find - they are very active today on Wall Street and in the US government and likely in governments around the world today.
Follow Naomi Klein and you will discover these criminals are controlling this planet. How integrated they are in Canada, I don't know. Does attendance at the Bilderberg meetings indicate suspicious activity that could result in unfavourable forms of government? If so, then Gordon Campbell and Peter Mansbridge who attended the gathering in Spain this spring should be carefully watched. Anything that is held in secret from the media and the citizens of the world, must be regarded as suspicious and perhaps dangerous.
But what about the necessary secret strategic planning of war - well of course if one is engaging in war that is designed to overtake another, yes secret strategies are necessary. BUT without war there would be no need for secrecy would there?
I know I am naive, but I want human beings to live in peace and harmony. Is it possible? When we read history it would seem not.
But who wrote the history? The people involved in the wars. Is that the majority of people on this planet - perhaps not!
If the majority of people want Peace, then surely we should be able to convince others who are just acting out of fear.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Not a blue tooth wireless - a brain disorder
After my experience with David Deng, an autistic man in in late teens or early twenties, I am more and more conscious of the folks - can't remember writing about that (memory is also diminishing)
Jo-Ann is a teaching assistant at Eric Hammer High School in the Special Education Department. She spends every day assisting students with these handicaps.
Interesting that I am attracting this into my life these days - and since I have no clue why, I'll look at it all with an attitude of grateful appreciation for an increased awareness.
I have a sense that I also have a mental handicap that I may have had my whole life but it has only become more exaggerated in my senior years. My typing which used to be very fast and very accurate is becoming less and less accurate - but it is probably the result of dyslexia. I am typing my letters in reverse order.
For example if I just type without thinking - not easy now that I am conscious of doing it, my letters will appear in reversed order - it is not because of poor spelling skills - my spelling and grammar has always been very good.
I will just continue to be grateful for all that comes to me and to enjoy peace on demand from my meditation.